Friday, January 20, 2012
Stains on the character
A friend once made a New Year's resolution not to eat spaghetti while reading borrowed books. I was impressed by her altruism.
Most of us know not to fork up pasta - especially the tomato-y sort - without covering up a white top, but it's a constant irritation to me how often I try to get away with cleaning my teeth - with an enthusiastic electric toothbrush, what's more - while wearing black.
More garments than I like to think of have been ruined this way. You can read here how to remove toothpaste stains, but I can't say I'm optimistic about my latest folly. Will I ever learn?
The most famous stained garment in history would have to be Monica Lewinsky's blue dress. But quite a few celebrities have also made besmirched public appearances. Here, for instance, is another blue dress:
The attention-hungry Ms Hilton seems entirely unaware of those impressive oil-stains on the front of the nice frock she's showing off.
I'm ashamed to say that I found her posing thus on this site, which features a section called Meanest Celebrity photos. And I suppose they are, from the celebrities' point of view. But having - I confess - flicked through the gallery of 150 pics, I decided they served the public good. Gorgeous images of models and movie stars are responsible for so much female (and possibly male) misery, that to see Elle Macpherson with a whopping cold sore, Liam Neeson's embarassing wet spot, and any number of stars suffering zits, cellulite and bad hair days, often while picking their noses, is a breath of fresh air. What do you know, people - they're actually human.