And in other news ...

That charmer Mel Gibson has been at it again - abusing, bullying and, presumably, terrifying a woman he was once powerfully attracted to. Not that he doesn't still require servicing by her from time to time, but she needed to know she was no longer his first choice for the task.

He was outraged that the mother of his eight-month-old daughter had fallen asleep before attending to his needs. So outraged that he felt he might have to burn down the house. After she'd given him his blow job.

While we're on the subject, you would think that, after all this time, men might have come up with more enticing terminology for what they want so badly. Don't they realise the extent to which they're decreasing their chances of getting anything at all from a woman by using the word "job"? Especially once her head has hit the pillow.

But back to Mel. How predictably dreary to read that he was especially virulent on the subject of Ocksana Grigorieva's appearance. The very same appearance that had once worked its magic on him. Her breast implants looked "stupid"; they made her look like a "whore"; she was dressed so provocatively that, if she got raped, it would be "her fault".

Mel Gibson, meet Andy Hayden. You guys just have so much in common.